It is too adorable for words.I was giddy with glee.
A bunch of rolled up diapers are surrounded by flannel receiving blankets and wrapped up in "It's a Girl!" and "Jesus Loves Me" ribbon. It's topped with a sweet lil' lamb, garnished with pink flowers and a tiny Bible. There's even a little outfit separating the layers.
Ingenious!
Adorably ingenious.
I can't bring myself to take it apart. Luckily, I snuck some peaks and discovered the diapers are size 2 and the outfit is 6 months. So I still have some time.
Relief. At least for the moment.
Why is it that I have a hard time getting rid of things? Throwing things away? Taking them apart?
Is the adorableness of the diaper cake really adding to my quality of life? (Actually, right now that would be a "yes".)
I hang onto things way more often than I should. So does my husband. You should see our basement.
I discovered that for me, things hold memories. I believe that if I get rid of something, I'll get rid of that memory and I'll never have that memory again. Which, realistically, could very well be true.
I want to grip my memories with an iron fist. I like my memories. I don't want them to go.
My memories make me who I am.
But maybe memories are supposed to be a gift -- floating in and out of our consciousness -- coming and going at a whim. Maybe it's ok to let some of them go. Maybe I am not me because of my memories, but I am just me -- a child of God. Memories or not.
It seems to circle back to my experiment of letting-go of control -- first my to-do lists and now my memories.
God has some beautiful words for us in Jeremiah:
"Thanksgivings will pour out of the windows; laughter will spill through the doors." (30:19)
"I'll refresh tired bodies; I'll restore tired souls." (31:25)
Now that is joy: pouring, spilling, laughing, refreshing, restoring . . .
That is for today. That is for the future. Memories not required.
And perhaps a slice of diaper cake to go with it.
Can I have cool whip on my slice?
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